Friday 40 for 40s - #15: you can't change the past

Items #1 and #20 that I'm learning I can't change is:

Anything about my past
and
Any mistakes I've made - but I can learn from them

40 years worth of life includes a lot of actions, choices, decisions and opportunities that were taken and missed.  Obviously not all of those actions, choices, decisions or opportunities were the wisest or the ones that I would choose if I had my time over again and I've definitely made lots and lots of mistakes.  It's so easy to allow this to turn into regret - "I wish I had..." or "I wish I hadn't".

However, I've realized that there is no benefit in having these regrets, because I can't change any of it.  Can I learn from it and allow it to make me make wiser, more informed decisions?  Absolutely - if I choose to take the time to reflect back and glean what I can from those situations.  But regret?  It causes nothing but guilt, sadness, frustration, shame.

Taking the sting of regret out of the past also gives me more freedom in the present and future to make healthy decisions.  I don't need to be paralyzed with anxiety about what will happen if I make a wrong choice... fearful of the regrets that will kick in if I choose wrong.  Instead, I can make decisions based on the information in front of me (again, assuming that I take the time to reflect) and step with confidence into whatever the present and future holds.